Breakfast Of Champions

Actual conversation this morning:
S:  howdy
me:  howdy
S:  did you see that project i sent you?
me:  my internet is out at home so i coudn't view on my phone
S:  omg, do you feel completely naked??
me:  i have a smart phone so i could limp along
me:  more underdressed for the environment
S:  ha! good one!
me:  i am Teh Funneh
S:  no lie

This post (as well as the return of Teh Funneh) are brought to you courtesy of the following:

Breakfast of Champions

Worry not my loves, some of these pills are vitamins. The breakdown is as follows:

1. Prenatal vitamin (as long as I'm breastfeeding) - large pink oval
2. Calcium + Vitamin D (osteoporosis prevention) - LARGER pink oval
3. Fish Oil (many reasons)  - yellow clear oval
4. Vitamin B (many reasons)  - orange oval
5. Vitamin D (my levels are low so I aim for about 4000 IU daily) - two white circles
6. Ativan (anxiety) - slightly different white circle
7. Welbutrin (depression) - tan oval pill
8. Zoloft (depression/anxiety/rage) - 1/2 pill yellow oval (weaning off this one gradually)
9. Celexa (depression/anxiety/rage) - 1/2 pill salmon oval (adding this one gradually)

The Zoloft is going away at the end of the week as the Celexa dose is increased to 20mg and the Wellbutrin is increased to 300mg. Ativan is only as needed and will go away in the next couple of weeks as the new regimen takes effect.


I'm sharing this with you because I think it is important to not be ashamed of the things you do to be healthy. Hell yes I'm medicated. (If I were a diabetic, no one would think twice about my need for insulin.) This should be seen the same way. Simply put, my body doesn't produce a substance it needs in an adequate supply so I'm supplying an artificial form of that substance so that I DO have an adequate supply.


Just because my particular disorder involves my brain, that doesn't mean I'm all crazy up in here.


I've decided to stop my own personal "War On Drugs" when it comes to drugs I need.

Edit: I'm now all seriously pissed off and angry about some personal family-related stuff that I will not get into here. I'm only sharing this because I'm managing to maintain my composure (other than that one little crying fit but we won't talk about that). The meds and therapy must be doing something!!!


Edit again: Apparently things were phrased poorly in the conversation that was reference in my first edit. I'm still annoyed but going to go eat something fattening, which I am sure will help immensely.


Here, watch video of Jamie lying in the grass. You're welcome.

Not There Yet

So I feel like I'm doing ok, but really I'm not. The slightest little thing still brings me to tears. Today it was not getting a leave slip approved for my therapy appointment. Yesterday it was a broken head band. Little and silly inconsequential things but they still make me lose my composure.

It's not fair, having to choose between crying and being angry.

I can't wait until I feel better.

I can't wait until I have more energy.

I can't wait until I stop looking at the clock at 7pm, wishing it was bed time.

I'm supposed to call my doctor on Friday and let him know if the medications are working. I didn't take any Ativan today because it is "as needed' and I was being hopeful that I wouldn't need it. Guess I needed it after all.

I'm really hoping that the way I feel today won't be the way I feel on Friday. If it is then it might mean the medicines aren't working. That also means weeks more of feeling this way while we try something else.

I can't do weeks more of this. I just can't.