I pull into the driveway and sit for a minute, engine idly quietly. The air conditioning blowing on my face does not feel very cool and I am reminded of another something added to my list of things to do. I sit for a minute, resting my head on the steering wheel and savoring the quiet and almost darkness of outside. After a few minutes, I take a deep breath and turn off the vehicle.
Walking in the door, I hit a wall of noise. Two dogs prance at my feet and I hear the rhythmic 'thump thump thump' of a dog's tail hitting a wooden chair in the dining room and the clicking of claws on the hard wood floor. The cat weaves in and out of the legs of the table and glares at the dogs, annoyed as usual by their very existence.
My husband is standing in the living room, holding our daughter. My son turns and sees me and immediately yells, "MAMA MAMA MAMA!" and runs to me, flinging his small arms around my legs and holding on tightly. In that same instant, the baby twists around and gives me that wide open smile that I know is just for me and leans for me to take her. I reach out and gather the baby in one arm while using my free hand to run my fingers through the blond curls of my son.
Another daughter is curled up in a blue chair doing her homework, tugging at the long braid hanging over her shoulder. Her eyebrows are scrunched together in concentration and I don't have to look at the book to know it is math. This makes me smile inside because she reminds me so much of myself at that age.
I try to not think of the one who is not with us and fail. My heart saddens for a moment. I'll text her later and tell her I love her.
My son looks up at me, still clinging to my legs. "Mama? Can we snuggle in the big bed now?"
"Baby, are you ready for bed already? Are you tired?"
I glance at my husband, who nods and shoots me his "I'm all done" look. “He’s been waiting for you to come home.”
I look at the clock and see that it’s only a few minutes past 7 and nearly an hour before bedtime.
My boy tugs at me. "I not a baby Mama. I'm a big boy."
"Yes sweetie. I know you are a very big boy but even when you are bigger than Daddy you will still be my baby man."
"I not a baby man Mama, I'm a big boy!"
"Yes honey, you are my big boy."
"Ok Mama. Can we go snuggle in the big bed now?"
I think about all of the things I planned to do when I got home. Then I looked at my beautiful boy's face.
"Yes honey. We can go snuggle in the big bed."
Heather of The Extraordinary Ordinary invited us to Just Write and link up to her blog every Tuesday. She said to just write freely, capturing a moment without forcing it or spending too much time in clarification. Please visit her for details. I love that she asked us to do this and it is so absolutely perfect that I discovered this right after attending Kate Hopper's session at the Minnesota Blogger Conference. Maybe tomorrow I will share my free writing from the weekend. Maybe. :)
24 comments:
you did an awesome job at capturing the moment of coming home. so much in a moment!
That's the way to really live.
ah yes...HOME!
Thank you for sharing!
The best advice I ever got was to put snuggle, play and read a book on my to do list every day.
I'm glad you got to snuggle in the big bed.
I love the images of your busy family, that much resembles mine.
I'm so glad you chose to go snuggle.
And yes, we were in a similar place when writing. How wonderful. :)
I always treasure that last moment of silence in the car before I walk in the house. But snuggles? Nothing beats snuggles.
Yep, that about sums up most of our evenings lately. The only thing you left out was the sinking feeling in your stomach whenever the phone rings now. ;)
I can feel this moment, see it like I'm there, feel it right down to my bones.
You are a gorgeous writer.
And that juggling act - of soft baby curls and math homework and heart-tugs for the older ones out in the world.. it's so hard and beautiful, isn't it?
-Ellie
well, I'm sure you didn't mean to make me cry, but here I am. I would do anything, ANYTHING, to get a snuggle out of the boys. Alas, I get a lot of screaming. Damn you autism.
beautifully done! inspires me to take a regular moment of life and be really present enough to recall it in such detail
You know one of the things I love about this project? 1.) Your boy will always have that moment in your mommy life to truly KNOW how much you loved him at that very moment. 2.) During the next week, I will pay more attention to the specifics that go on around me so I have them to write about next week. This will make me pay attention...even more than I already do. Beautiful post! I could just imagine walking right in with you!
That moment before facing the chaos of life is captured perfectly!
Great post of "right then"
i love this. sometimes I dread coming home to the madness, but I always love it. always.
That was really great, I could so perfectly visualize each person. You ARE a writer, don't forget it again! Can't wait to read more.
Something about coming home leaves me exhausted and thrilled. Pumped up and weighed down. I feel that you have snapped that moment with your words.
Plus the look in your husband's eyes? Ha. That's how I look like every day. I hope he is as gentle in his mind as you were in yours. (Which I am sure my guy is, it's just scary to see things from a different perspective.)
Those snuggles... there's always time for them :)
What a great mental picture. There is just nothing better than baby - I mean big boy - snuggles.
Yes, this. Home and the baby/big boy, and the big bed, and even the sigh of sadness.
It's life- the way we're meant to be in it.
Lovely.
I love the details. Great job writing this piece. So often I come home after being gone for even just an hour and the kids are so excited to see me. It makes my heart swell.
ah, we all need to stop what we are doing and just enjoy the moment at hand. I've really been focusing on that lately...man it's hard.
I felt like I was standing there behind you watching the whole scene!
I could feel this post, lady. You did an amazing job. I felt like I was right there with you. Thank you!
Beautiful friend. It is hard but it was a good choice!
This is just beautiful!
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